October’s Blockage

Those who have been with me for a while know that October is my favorite month. As a lifelong horror book and movie addict and total sugar junkie, Halloween is my favorite holiday. It’s also the time when my friends and I are all together the most, carving pumpkins, hanging out, watching movies, and being total nerds. Judge if you will, but it’s like a month long burst of all those good feeling Christmas is supposed to have.

There are only a few things that can ruin or dampen these good feelings. Regrettably, this October has two of the biggest.

 

1) Interruptions

From a previous entry, you will know that I’m not a big fan of weddings. I was in the last one I went to, and though I bitched about it forever, I really enjoyed myself. Being a selfish shit, I apparently just don’t like being inconvenienced to celebrate the love of others (this does not change regardless of whether I am single or not). This is either caused or exacerbated by my normal introverted nature.

Last year I wanted nothing more than to have my friends married. I love them both and that made me shut up my whining and suck it up. Eventually.

I am under no such moral constraints this time. First, I barely know Groom #2. Second, Groom #1 is a train wreck. Reports are that he is still texting his ex, saying he misses him and loves him, blah, blah, blah. This would just be understandable (if unacceptable) cold feet…if Groom #1 had ever stopped texting said ex. Third, the wedding is on a Sunday night and no dinner will be served. Groom #1 is a wonderful person who happens to think that he is a west coast version of Carrie Bradshaw from Sex and the City (writing talent not included). He is going for what he thinks is currently trendy rather than something timeless. He is having an hors d’oeuvres bar, no food, trail mix to curb the hunger of the separate wedding parties, and expects the partying to last deep into the recesses of the night. Some bitches have work the next day. Fifth, Groom #2 is a sweet sycophantic echo who cheerfully regurgitates what Groom #1 says and does. Sixth, this wedding will be filled with no food, plenty of alcohol, an overdose of pretense, and what seems like one person’s Most Popular Day—groom #2 being incidental and not intended to consume any of the spotlight.

My duties for this wedding are to make a pizza run with my friend (featured in the previous wedding), bring it up to the hotel room for those who are in the wedding and not satisfied with the seed bell snack, toss the pizza in their respective troughs, and back away. And to be polite and smile as though this wedding was the single most important moment of MY life. Thank goodness for honed acting skills.

This has taken up two weekends in precious October.

 

2) The Weather

This is the other thing which can ruin the feeling of autumn and October. I live in a place where there are 2, maybe as few as 1.5 seasons, and most of those are watered down versions of their glory elsewhere. I remember when September was part of autumn, where you could feel summer die and give way to the beginnings of autumn. No more. September is full-blown summer, and it lasts so long that it sometimes creeps, all unwelcome, into October.

This is the case now. We had a mild summer, for which I was thankful, though that usually means that our version of winter (usually termed “mild autumn weather” in normal places) will be exceptionally boring—high 60s and mid 70s from November to beginning February.

Then September killed us, violating us with the heat we thought we escaped. And it doesn’t want to let go. It was 93 degrees this past weekend, the first weekend of October, 82 today, and is supposed to spiral down to upper 60s and then climb right back to mid-to-high 70s. Where I live, any day not in the 70s or 80s is abnormal. Rain is virtually unheard of—if we get a little two day drizzle this winter, one will see all over the news “Storm Watch, 2013” emblazoned in red letters on every local news station.

So, it feels as though I am disconnected from my favorite season and the people I prefer to spend it with. I can’t stand the heat. A few of the people closest to me seem to think I have some sort of reverse seasonal depression—heat and sunlight and lack of seasons depress me. Moving will be an option, however sad, but not yet. And so I currently suffer through the blandness of our 1.5 seasons.

I want orange and red leaves, a wind which changes from so mild that it almost cannot be felt to the crisp wind and days of autumn. Sun and cold. Maybe a few clouds. Some people call where I live paradise, and I both understand those people and think they are some alien species from the planet Stupidia in the galactic system of Blandaxia.

All I want are my friends, a few orange leaves, a horror movie or two (dozen), and something other than perpetual summer.

In short, I want October.

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~ by Darren Endymion on October 7, 2013.

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