Edits and Moving and Overtime! Oh, Hell!

Yeah, that has pretty much been my life. More purging, getting extra days to move out on the weekend, and being generally frantic. And the things I am taking with me! My video games alone…if I considered them a waste of time or money, I would be concerned for my mental stability. As it is, I have no more thoughts for my sanity and value system than I normally do.

Loser Games

The overtime at work is still ongoing. On Friday we discovered that we had one ray of hope for reprieve — five full time helpers. Today I found out that this was foiled and the offer rescinded by the doom-sharting cloud of upper management.

Only meaner.

Only meaner.

What sent me into a spiral of neurotic panic was that on Friday I got the anticipated e-mail from the short story/anthology editor. I guess I didn’t fully appreciate the strain my first novel, Winter’s Trial, put on me. Yes, I know I’m a guppy in a thimble. I haven’t even made it to the pond or the river or out into the ocean, or even evolved Pokemon-style into a bigger fish.

Here's hoping...

Here’s hoping…

Yet, Winter’s Trial was my first published anything and the editing process was very challenging. I did learn a great deal, but most of that was in the way of personal revelations about people, demands, the highs and lows of the reading public my current work is thrust toward, expectations, and my sense of my own work.

I learned a great deal about being a writer (on a very small scale), but I don’t feel I learned much about the, uh, art of writing. I think this was the harder lesson and something I will continue to grow with. After Winter’s Trial, I sort of became an abused turtle and pulled inside to evaluate everything.

Turtle Day

I finally came to the conclusion that I very much want to write and I want to do it for me. I want people to like what I write, because though I write for me, I wouldn’t seek publication if I didn’t want to share a little bit. And, of course some small success is necessary or nobody will continue to publish me. Self-publication is a viable, honorable option, but I do like the intervention of a learned, focused, fair editor who can be a positive influence.

So, I wrote a short story for an anthology I originally had no intention of writing for. I just had too much going on. But I got inspired, wrote it, sent it to beta readers, cleaned it up, submitted it, and had it accepted, all in about 2-3 weeks. It’s much more fantasy than Winter’s Trial and I like that.

Then I got my edits back.

Thanks Panic

My learning experiences with Winter’s Trial were not painless ones. Quite the opposite. Before even looking at the edits, I started feeling all fragile and whiny again.

I opened the document like it contained plauge-bearing spiders the size of Shetland ponies. I quickly scrolled through…and laughed. Nothing. Nothing bad, anyway. There were few marks and they were all reasonable, logical, and were all phrased with professional kindness and courtesy.

I was an idiot. I totally psyched myself out…and for abso-fucking-lutely nothing.

Me.

Me.

I finished the edits in an hour and will go over them again later. It was actually pleasant. I had a severe moment of typical self-doubt, but I got over it with a nap and some Nutella. I’m more than okay. This time was nothing. Either I’m stronger (after getting over my embarrassingly lame expectations), or prepared, or both. Am I more experienced? Jaded? Hateful? Who cares?

I have to turn in my edits by this weekend. Then the dreaded blurbs and taglines and marketing sheet needs to be done. But, I can handle that, too.

The publication date is set for April 23rd, 2014. I will mention more about the meat of it later, when I have more polished (read: any) blurbs about the anthology and my contribution to it.

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~ by Darren Endymion on February 24, 2014.

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