Death Postponed, Writing Imminent

Ugh. Remember how I was babbling that I was going to keep up the habit of writing every day of the week but one? Yeah. Fail! But, considering everything, I think I did okay. I missed Tuesday because all I could think about was…well, a doctor’s appointment that I had the next day where the words “slow, painful death” could conceivably have been used. Well, probably by me…but the problem and potential still stand. Wednesday I was so relieved at the outcome (which was still inconclusive but very heartening) that all I did was slept.

To quote a friend, I was clenched up tighter than a virgin on a first date.

When that unclenching happened, I passed the fuck out. Now, even though nothing has been resolved, I have had reassurances (from a professional, not just my friends blowing sparkles and sunshine up my ass) that all the worry and horror were for nothing and that I am perfectly fine. In about a month (!) I will know for sure and what I need to do…or know that I can do cartwheels of health and happiness and prepare for the upcoming search for a new job and (hopeful) moving 800+ miles away.

So, I’ve had a lot going on.

But, I had a lot of long sleepless nights…which was totally my fault. The cold I had on top of this was kicking my ass, and I heard that vitamin B could help. I took it…before bed. Seriously, I was that fucking stupid. I knew something was up in the back of my head, but one tired, ass-dragging day at work I was hit with the sheer force of my stupidity. I perked up and said aloud, “Wait, isn’t vitamin B for energy?!” My friend and coworker looked at me and said, “Aren’t you a pharmacy technician?”

Whatever, hag.

So, one of those nights (after I ditched the fucking vitamin B) I was drifting off to sleep thinking about writing and how I wanted to write something again and was thinking about what it would be…and three pieces of unrelated story elements  came together and formed a full idea in my head. Characters, quirks, unintentional twist, plot, all sorts of stuff. Nearly fully formed.

So, now I’m planning that out, just writing a few of the intricate details. And that has sparked the writing of a synopsis for the giant, ambitious thing I have mentioned before. Is it bigger than I thought originally? Of course. But it’s coming along nicely. I do tend to get overwhelmed by the stuff in my head…when the story wants to get out. Usually writing a synopsis helps to get it to leave the the hell alone, but that hasn’t been the case lately. It only makes it worse and want to come out more.

So, all I hear in my head is a possessed Gollum voice saying, “In time, preciousssss.”

Next week: I think I’ll go back to a definite theme, probably drawing on the “forgotten words” from the recent A-Z challenge. Thanks for sticking around and dealing with my schizophrenic entries lately. At least you know why they’ve been all over the place. *skipping off to write more*

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~ by Darren Endymion on June 5, 2014.

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