Heat, Horror, and Being Lazy

I am so lazy in the heat. While the people in the rest of the country are just digging their way out of snow, cold weather, and praying for spring, I have spent the past four days wishing I could trade places. Here in Southern California where I live, not but a few miles from the beach, we broke records for heat in March. It was at least 90 degrees Friday, Saturday, Sunday, and today. Kids slid home from school in their own sweat. People in office buildings decided to be healthy and take little walks on their breaks…and turned their asses right back around and went inside.

Southern California heat waves aren’t just heat. They are usually Santa Ana winds, where the winds of hell blow brimstone dust directly up the nostrils of any poor soul who goes outside. Our whole office has stuffy noses and has been sneezing, but none of us are actually sick (except that one girl who is always sick and coughs like she has tuberculosis all year around. Every office has one.)

So, I had all sorts of plans this weekend: to write, to do laundry, to go shopping, to read, to watch movies, to not be hot, to maybe hang out with some friends. I did laundry and went shopping, both out of necessity. Other than that, I lazed around on my phone and played a video game. The days were fine because the air conditioning would turn on, but in the nights the heat of all the summer days in the world rise directly into my room. I can leave my room, but that’s where all the good stuff is.

Consequently, nothing got done. Tomorrow, in the schizophrenic way the weather has here, will be a lovely 78 degrees, and this will hold for the rest of the week.

I have heard that people watch the Rose Parade (or whatever) and shortly thereafter is when we have the greatest influx of new people moving to California. Don’t do it, people. It’s expensive, the weather is scorching, there are only two drops of water in the whole state, it rains maybe three times a year, there are crazy people everywhere, and I truly believe that it is the narcissistic capitol of the States (and many places beyond). I’ve lived here all my live.

Everything I know is here, so I might just be jaded and biased. Bored, even. To some people, this is paradise. Don’t believe it. San Diego is wonderful, the weather in the San Francisco area is cool and wonderful (but full of crazy people…my ex included. Bwahahaha!), but those places require high paying jobs or 17 roommates. There are other places. Thea beaches are wonderful, but horribly overcrowded. And you can’t live by them.

Whatever. I always have an excuse. But pain too excruciating to sit up for long, heat, terror of my imminent death, 10 hour work days…wait. That stuff all sucks! Maybe it’s all that life stuff that’s been going on and I’m not just a lazy idiot.

Or both.


~ by Darren Endymion on March 16, 2015.

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