Challenged by Greed and Sadness

So, I have mentioned Prince Scientist before. Nothing huge has changed other than that we had another Jane Austen moment yesterday with him in a crowd of people and seeing me across a room, making eye contact, holding it, and then me going on my way.

There is a woman I have worked with for years, a cute female in her early-to-mid forties (though she looks much younger), who I have always thought was super cute and sweet, if unfortunately materialistic. We shall call her Trinh. She completely lacks gaydar. There are people here at work who she has no idea about and all I could do was roll my eyes, pat her on the head, and tell her she’s sweet. Even Hellen Keller would be like, “Dayum! That is a hoooo-mo right there! Bring him over here and let me feel his bitch face.” *scraping away glitter*

While Prince Scientist was training at the end of my row and I was talking to him and we were having our flurry of Jane Austen moments, Trinh was desperately after the Prince’s trainer (another gay male). When training ended, the trainer got transferred from our building and Trinh suddenly decided that she liked Prince Scientist. She knows I think he’s cute, but adamantly denies that he’s gay. She has seen us glance at each other, stare each other down, flirt a little, has seen him watch me go into the break room and crane his neck to see me, has watched him ignore her to talk to me, has flirted with him only to have him smile politely and turn away, yet she has convinced herself that he is straight and likes her.

What I wasn’t prepared for is Trinh’s pursuit of him and the horrifically ugly side of her I have now seen. She stalks him in the halls. She name drops him at every opportunity as if to prove something to me. She chased him outside and came upstairs looking disgruntled and unhappy when he was talking with another woman and then said hi to me and asked how I was, ignoring her. (For someone who doesn’t think the Prince is gay, she sure is treating me like a Mean Girl would a rival).

Then the ugliest parts came out. Remember when I said that she is materialistic? Well, the scientists make a lot of money. I recently checked: the scientists here make between $100,000 and $175,000 a year. I know that’s part of her motivation. Trinh may be realizing that Prince Scientist doesn’t like her, because she has recently said, “I wouldn’t go out with him anyway — he’s just a scientist. He doesn’t make enough money for me.”

1) How goddamned shallow. Are people really like this?

2) Considering this heifer doesn’t make more than $18 an hour, I don’t see where she has room to talk.

3) Sour grapes, bitch. She’s realizing that he’s not interested and so makes up the most shallow of excuses to put him down.

4) He likes boys!

Prince Scientist is a hell of a catch, even if he worked at a bookstore, or Starbucks, or fast food. The fact that he has a damn good job puts him at a nearly unattainable, totally intimidating level for me. I have to admit that he really does seem to be interested in me, and that still spins my head. Maybe it’s because I grew up ridiculously poor and now I’m doing perfectly fine, but I don’t need all that money, and it’s honestly not a draw for me. I’m not wanting for anything and I have money to save and splurge; anything more is just ancillary. What I need is someone kind, and intelligent, and funny, and responsible. Yeah, I want him to be hot, but with those other qualities balanced, there are things that I can let slide. I don’t know Prince Scientist as well as I would like, but the shallowness with which Trinh has ostensibly cast him aside is offensive.

Yet, Trinh still stalks him in the hallways. She still claims that he’s straight. Since I am fairly confident in the Prince’s homosexuality, it wouldn’t affect me, but since there are limited, small windows of time where I can potentially run into him, Trinh’s stalking takes away from the potential time I have. I don’t understand greedy, shallow people like this, yet those actions, while ultimately fruitless and deceptive and shocking, are a hindrance to me.

So, I’m left baffled, irritated, and wondering if I will ever have the nerve to talk to him and end this Jane Austen bullshit…or if it’s the potential that I crave. Nah. I’d rather have the reality. I write and create and make up fantasies in story form all the time. For me personally, I would rather have the real thing.


~ by Darren Endymion on April 16, 2015.

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