U = Ursula, A to Z Blog Challenge

This sucks. I wrote out an entire blog entry and went to save it…and my document decided to take a dump on me. I lost the whole thing. It did the auto recovery, but then my computer itself totally crapped out and restarted. This will be nothing like it was, but I assembled some pretty cool pictures, so I’ll try to use them.

I started out saying that Ursula seems to me to be the point where the Disney villains went from evil to evil-lite. We started with Maleficent and the Evil Queen and the Queen of Hearts, gruesome, terrible fairy tale and literature villains. One wished death on an infant for not being invited to a party, another wanted her stepdaughter’s heart cut out and put in a box just because she was prettier, and another was a raving lunatic who beheaded anyone who annoyed her, putting even Henry VIII to shame.

I think a good comparison would be motivations. The Evil Queen and Gothel from Tangled were motivated by the same thing — vanity. Yet think of the differences in villainy. Cut out her heart or put her in a tower? In the original Rapunzel, Gothel banished Rapunzel’s love to the desert after cutting out his eyes with thorns. Rapunzel was also banished and her tears cured the Prince. Sure, Eugene died in Tangled, and that was sad, awful, but it seemed to lack the evil of the early villains, and it shows that Disney watered down the evil of the antagonists.

Ursula seemed to be that tipping point when Disney villains went from evil to comic. Where they did terrible things, but weren’t intrinsically evil. She wanted power and revenge. She actually apologizes to Ariel, saying she wanted something more.

Ursula

Ursula was banished from Atlantica for…something. Trying to take over the kingdom, eating the entire sea, magicking evil, whatever. She was bad. “Banished and wasted and practically staaaaaarving.”

But she fortunately knows a little magic. This allows her to eke out a living of pointless vengeance and trickery. Her motivations for her dealings with the other merpeople gives a more subtle indication of her evil. She uses her magic to give them what they ask for, but she gets something in return, and if Ariel’s sacrifice is any indication, Ursula’s magic didn’t come cheap. So, she likely gets more than she gives.

This face might be an indication that you were about to be tentacle raped by a sea witch.

This face might be an indication that you were about to be tentacle raped by a sea witch.

Why? It didn’t get her closer to the throne or to being back in Atlantica. What was Ursula’s motivation? Was she just a petty bitch? Possibly, but I prefer to think that she was gathering enough essences and magicks to eventually try to take over or challenge King Triton. And that’s another thing. Did anyone else notice just how many spermy things came out of her castle at the end? Did nobody in the ocean notice? Were there no missing persons report, no police, no army, no loved ones reporting the missing? How did that many disappearances go unpunished or unnoticed? Was King Triton asleep at the helm? Why didn’t he stop his sister?

Oh, didn’t you know? According to the commentary on the Little Mermaid blu-ray, Ursula was supposed to be Triton’s sister. So, if Triton was suddenly gone, Ursula would have had a claim to the throne. Yeah, it should have gone to his descendants, but it has been done before where a dead king’s brother screwed over his nieces and nephews in order to take power, sometimes even killing them or claiming they were bastards using a thin, frail “logic” and bullying others into accepting it. (I’m looking at your scoliosis-having ass, Richard III.)

The resemblance is striking, wouldn't you say?

The resemblance is striking, wouldn’t you say?

Ursula was a subtle evil, she was funny, and she was sexy, too. She was a great villain, and one of the legendary ones. With that body, how could she not be?

Bootylicious.

Bootylicious.

There have been good, evil villains since then. Gaston was a douchebag xenophobic hunter and a misogynist. He did terrible things, but he wasn’t more than a testosterone fueled, egomaniacal, steroidal ape. Frollo…well, he’s the exception. He was pure, lustful evil in the guise of a saint and a godly man. His song “Hellfire” was actually scary, and one of the darker things Disney has ever done — he was singing about lust and actually says “…she will be mine or she will burn.” He is prepared to burn all of Paris and burn the object of his lust if she doesn’t return his feelings. Everything about the invaders in Pocahontas was evil, but in a more nebulous way.

Ursula was evil and vengeful, and in the end it was her own power and rage that killed her. Had she not created that whirlpool or roiled the sky in her anger, the ship couldn’t have been steered to impale her and she wouldn’t have been hit by her own lightning, thus scaring the hell out of any child in the audience.

And becoming charred chum.

And rendering her into charred chum.

Post Entry confession — I have to apologize for this entry (for anyone reading). My heart just isn’t in it after I lost all that first attempt…and it was pretty good, too. I considered trying harder to reconstruct it, but just to post an entry that so few will read and nobody will pay attention to? I had the fun of writing it only to watch it go down in Ursula’s writing tentacles. At least I’ll have the memories, right?

Ursula wants the attention I gave her originally. And some Xanax. And Visine, apparently.

Ursula wants the attention I gave her originally. And some Xanax. And Visine, apparently.

Alternate letter considerations: Uganda, uvula, ugly, utopia

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~ by Darren Endymion on August 25, 2015.

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