Glitter, Fat, Horror, Murder…and Happiness

What do these things have in common? Nothing — if I didn’t have the most eclectic viewing habits known to man. These are the things I have been watching, absorbing, and experiencing.

As unabashedly gay as it sounds (and it is), I love magical girl anime. Sailor Moon owns my soul. However, there is a series taken over and dubbed by Netflix and retitled Glitter Force. I can’t describe it without being crude, so here we go: It’s gayer than rolling around in butter and glitter, watching Sailor Moon, and dressing in drag as the Little Mermaid, all while blowing another guy. It lacks the depth of other magical girl stuff, but it’s absolute, pure fun. I finished the first season today and my favorite moment was when the cute, scared, timid girl — whose alter ego is named Glitter Peace — was fighting in the final battle against a giant Terror Clown. They did the normal sound off, like, “I’m Glitter Lucky! I’m Glitter Sunny!” When it came to Peace’s turn, she growled, bellowed, and sounded like she was hiding a kunai in her hair, ready to shank a bitch. She sounded like she was really saying, “I’m Glitter PEACE, fuckers, and I swear to glitter, I will kick your clown nuts up into your afro and make you eat my pooooo!”  I watched that part three times and cackled. Then, to mellow out the glitter storm of femininity happening in my room, I followed it with some Family Guy and the new Voltron (awesome, by the way).

My other viewing has been all over the spectrum. I’ve been devouring My 600 Pound Life (pun intended) and cheering on or cussing out some sadly obese people. I have my favorites (Milla, I’m looking at you, and I owe you about 50 hugs), and my shank-a-bitches (Marla…someone is coming for your obstinate bitch ass).

I have finally reclaimed my TV…somewhat. My hours at work have changed, so I can stay up an hour or so later and watch some stuff without horrifying or boring my friend and roommate. I also claimed the TV for the better part of a day. I have watched The Conjuring, Annabelle, Nightmare on Elm Street, The Taking of Deborah Logan, Creep, and others (the latter two are on Netflix. Check them out.) Since I work from home now, I put my Kindle Fire on the side of my desk and watch movies all day (but unfortunately, my Halloween Standards are not on Netflix or free for Amazon Prime, making my TV and Blu-Ray player necessary). My list of horror movies to watch has increased since I have uncovered almost all of my DVDs and Blu-Rays. I normally would have started the Halloween movie viewing in September, but there were too many things going on. Now…look out.

I have also been watching a great deal of mini-documentaries on REAL horror — murder and true crime. It has been informative, sad, and entertaining to watch them…but not like I was doing the last time I went on a Forensic Files binge. That thought brings me full circle. The last time I watched more than a couple episodes of Forensic Files, I was staving off depression and (oddly) was using that as a ticket out. All I did was lie around, hating my life, my living situation, my job, the city I lived in, the weather I was forced to endure, and many other things. I saw no way out, no light at the end of the tunnel. The light was a concept, a hazy dream so far off that it didn’t seem real or possible.

Now…I have realized a great deal of that. If I could go back in time just a few short months and tell myself not to give up, that in less than half a year I would be typing this on my couch, in my living room in Oregon, away from all the stressors I had in California, having just experienced a massive rainstorm, windstorm, and thunderstorm…all while watching Trick ‘r Treat…well, that light at the end of the tunnel wouldn’t have been so lamentably far away.

Now…now I’m happier than I have been in years. And years and years. And there’s so much more to come, so much more potential. So gimme. If it took glitter, fat, horror, and murder to get to where I am…then I welcome them…on TV, anyway.

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~ by Darren Endymion on October 17, 2016.

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